Glory: Asking for the Big Stuff and Facing Pride

Ever wanted to do something amazing for the Kingdom?

Ever wanted to do something awesome for the Kingdom and start questioning yourself about whether it’s okay for you to do it?

Ever started questioning your motives and wondering if it’s Pride motivating your desire to get it done?

I’ve got something I care about that is um… very Paladin-y.  (This is mostly meaningful for those of you who’ve played WoW with me).  And I’ve been shuffling my feet and wondering, “Is this about me?”  Riding in on my white charger with sword in hand and freeing the captive, throwing them over my saddle and dropping them off at the Kingdom’s gate…

I dunno.  But … I thought…

1) If I’m okay talking with God about it, and confessing that I want to do this… and He doesn’t swat me down or slam doors in my face… maybe it’s cool with Him.

2) If I’d be okay if every other Christian went out and did the same thing… I’m probably not into it for my own glory.  I’m tots okay with that.  Wouldn’t it be awesome to grin at each other over our saddle-bows as we ride into the fray?

Right now I seem to be in wait-mode.  I’ve wondered if that’s “door closed” and… I still want it, but I’ll wait until it suits the Lord.  Can’t be an outlaw paladin.  Then I look at what’s been going on in my life and heart and think, “Uh,  Maybe this is me hammering out some dents in my armor.”  I’m talking going straight into the fray – I’ll need armor that’s in top shape.  (And if it happens, prepare to be asked for prayer support).

I wonder if anyone else out there has dreams so crazy big that they get embarrassed of them, won’t even ask… and maybe God is just waiting for them to ask already so He can put them in action?  Maybe some of us have to be crazy…

I’ll be here hammering out dents and using my whetstone and doing whatever comes ’round, whether or not I ever get called out to the front lines.  But if I go, I hope you won’t mind a few fierce war whoops.  😉

2 thoughts on “Glory: Asking for the Big Stuff and Facing Pride

  1. peoplegrowing

    Hey Lady,

    Just gotta say, I completely commiserate on “paladinny.” ^-^ My main on WOW was a Pali tank, and pretty much every game I play, if paladin is not available as a class, then I style a Fighter/Cleric in the manner of a paladin. My faves/mains have always been Palis. There is something deeply epic about a character of such powerful faith riding off to conquer evil and do good in God’s name.

    To that end, I fully understand the concern of pride – “Am I just trying to be EPIC, or is my heart really in the right place on this?” I am much younger in the faith than you are, but it sounds to me like you have the right idea about it. Pray, prepare, and ride when the Lord says ride! My only (ever so slight) modification (which you may well have accounted for) is just to make sure you aren’t so worried about pride that you hang back when there’s an opening, worried about whether or not it’s “for” you. Of course, you know your situation far better than I do, so hopefully all due consideration will be made so that, when the opening comes, you will know whether it’s yours or not.

    Good luck on your quest chain!

    1. hearthie Post author

      Thank you! Yes. EXACTLY what I’m working on – stopping worrying so much about my possible pride that I don’t get on the horse.

      (I roll a Pally or a Druid – don’t follow the druid, we run off of cliffs. 😉 )


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