Peace in Turbulence

Does anyone else have conversations with God where you know the stuff you’re REALLY not allowed to ask for – because He won’t let you finish the sentence?  This happens to me all the time.  Like this, “Dear Lord, could you please let the pur… pur… Oh.  Okay.  The purple pansies aren’t going to bloom any time soon?  Gotcha”.

It’s not like I always like what He is doing to me at any one time.  I don’t particularly enjoy the process.  I’ve had a long, wonderful, blessed time in the fields over the past few years – after as nasty a walk through the valley as I’d care to live through.  Now?  I’m going through another valley.  It’s not like the old one was.  No where near that bad.

But I’m being taught lessons.  Big lessons.  I’m being taught lessons about letting the steel backbone show a little bit more through the marshmallow fluff, and being a bit more blunt.  I’m being taught lessons about pride and the praise of men.  I’m learning about faith, and patience – real patience, where you wait for God’s timing, no matter how long it takes.  I’m learning about letting people I love dearly go through stuff instead of flinging myself between them and their valleys.

I’m enough of a nutjob to always enjoy the learning, always rejoice in what God is doing to me.  I am *not* enough of a nutjob to enjoy the process or the pain or the waiting.

I’m learning to listen to God and remember what He’s told me and wait on Him.  This valley? I knew this valley would come, because of just such a prayer conversation.  I *tried* to say, “Well, at least that issue is over and done with, we don’t have to revisit this ever again!”  I think I got about three words out and knew very clearly that it wasn’t the last time I was going to have to battle this particular lion.  It’s been a long time since I had that knowing.  I could easily have waited longer – but then NOW He’s telling me, ‘No.  Because I have something beautiful on the other side for you”.

Experience teaches me that He is faithful to reward obedience beyond my wildest dreams.

And really, what is this mortal life about anyway, except coming out on the other side to hear, “Well done, My good and faithful servant”.

Consent.  My God has my consent to shape me into what He wills.  And I am blessed to have a God Who will cradle me as I cry with the pain and struggle with the will to keep walking the path He has chosen.

Peace isn’t always about being overjoyed about where you are – it’s about the certainty of Whom you are walking through the darkness with.

Blessed be the name of the Lord, His will and His alone be done.  Amen.

10 thoughts on “Peace in Turbulence

  1. userdand

    Still wondering what the path is here. Just when I think I know, a curve ball slides across the plate. I’m not sure who’s pitching them. Are they leadings or distractions, you know? Perhaps I need to practice James 1:19 a little more and do more listening and less trying to hit one out of the park.

    1. hearthie Post author

      More prayer is never a bad plan. And listen, listen, listen.

      Through this particular set of turbulence, I’ve learned a great deal. I’m changing up a few things that have been pointed out to me as areas of improvement. I’m chilling out and letting Him handle things. That’s the biggest thing for me right now. Trust and obey and wait. If I’ve heard, “I’ve got this” from the Lord once this past six months, I’ve heard it a hundred times. He’s got me so busy, and blessing me so much… but the problems themselves? Well. He’s got them. I sure don’t!!!

      I’m just here. I’ll do what I’m told and live my days and enjoy what He’s given me and let the fall out be His. So many good things going in this crazy time… well, God is faithful.

      1. userdand

        Yesterday was a special day for me once again. I think part of my problem is the anxiety created by now seeing a not as distant end as I once did. I am chasing the late Steven Covey’s admonishment “to live, to learn, to love, to leave a legacy.” I’m sure he’s not the only one to advocate that, but I remember reading it in First Things First. I feel my eight day clock is well into the seventh day and the pressure is on to leave some legacy. I will leave behind very excellent children as a legacy, but I want something more. It’s probably pride and an immortality wish speaking.

  2. hearthie Post author

    I’m not sure what’s going on on your end, although feel free to let me know. FWIW… CS Lewis said that a man is not generally called to have an opinion of his own work. Your job, as a servant of God, is to do whatever it is you’re doing as unto the Lord. We’ll be judged (and rewarded) by the perfect Judge. We aren’t worldlings, we don’t need to care what the world thinks of us. Doing right by your family is always the right thing to do. Beyond that?

  3. userdand

    Thanks for that. Nothing tragic here. Just another year older, another day closer. I don’t get depressed, but I can be a melancholy baby. It does have a tendency to make me more insightful tough. I always find myself wishing I had done better by others so I find myself wanting to make up for that; not out of guilt but out of a feeling of social responsibility to enhance the life of others. Sounds a little like Christian love anyway.

    1. hearthie Post author

      -nods- Sorry for the melancholy. :/ You can’t go back, only forward. Anyway, we’re Christians. No death for us. And *I* am planning a very interesting and entertaining eternity. 🙂

      1. userdand

        My wife wants a party thrown right after her funeral and to have place cards on the table saying “See you soon, but hopefully not too soon.”

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